Chasing Hawk

I have had projects given to me in the past. As they were gifts I felt no guilt, remorse or dire need (lol) to start or finish right away.

ube quilting

If someone gives me something it is mine to do with what I want. They have no holds or terms of agreement in passing something on to another person.

I have a friend who used to do this all the time, As in "I'll give you this fabric but you have to promise to use it, and use this pattern too." That is not giving or gifting. That is a control issue. She doesn't control me any more.

Once I give something to someone, it is theirs to do with what they want.

peace

bearisgray

I still sort of cringe when I see someone post something like -

My grandma's aunt gave these blocks to my grandma, and then my grandma gave them to my mother, and my mother gave them to me - I hate them - but they were from family - what should I do with them?

popover

And the answer is "dump them at Goodwill".

sewbizgirl

What is the circumstance under which you accepted the 'gift project'? Were you asked to finish it for someone, with or without compensation? If it didn't appeal to you then you should have said 'no, thank you' at the time of the attempted gifting. Why would you take something you didn't want to do?

If you took it with great intentions and later changed your mind, you can always give it back and say you just really are not finding the time to work on it. End of story.

Or is there some sort of control issue under which you accepted the 'gift'? In any case, if it's causing you guilt, get rid of it.

lots2do

I love your reasoning. I'm going to remember that definition of offers.

Onebyone

Sometimes a guild member won't ask me they just bring me a ufo and say I know you like stars and I know I won't finish this so I brought it to you. When this happens I say thank you and donate it as is to Salvation Army in my DD's town. My town is too small to donate it in town. The quilter will see it. LOL

sylviasmom

I'm 73. My children are adults,with adult children. Although my only responsibility is my husband, he can take care of himself quite well. I no longer feel I should put my happiness aside to make someone else happy. No is a word I find I can say easily. But it must be said in a way that feelings are not hurt, ei: "My, you are such a dear to think of me, but no I cannot accept this.

lass

My daughter and I have an up front understanding. If we get something we don't like or won't use we say so and the giver takes it back with no hard feelings. My sister and I have this same agreement.