Parrothead

I was very lucky to have my Mother close by when I had my first three, had to do the fourth alone. However, my first three were teenagers so they helped. I went to Michigan and stayed a week with first granddaughter. My daughter was living with us when second granddaughter was born. I stayed with my daughter when each of the two grandsons were born. This is the way our family (aunts, etc.) have always done it and so there was not a question.

theifner

If I had a good relationship with my daughter I would just tell them I'm coming to help out for 2 weeks or how ever long you are going to stay.

Nolee

I helped delivery the little girl in the picture when the doctor didn't believe my daughter was ready to push; so the nurse and I said, "Fine, stay at lunch, we'll do it." We did.

I was also present at the birth of her brother two years ago. I stayed for four days after but did housework and cooking and let them enjoy the baby for the most part. That is their bonding time and I wanted them to have it. They were sad to see me leave, which was a nice feeling.

I would offer my help and wait, like others have suggested.

damaquilts

Just ask. If they say no just say ok , I will be here if you need me.

Both my daughters lived with me when they had their first. I was up with the babies at night because I heard them first. But the first time I saw my eldest pretending to be asleep when I went in the get the baby was the last time I went in. I was still working I needed my sleep too. lol I just told them that grandma was Not a built in baby sitter.
But I was the one they both wanted in the delivery room with them. Hubby's were there but got chased out. You know that "if you ever touch me again" point lol

I would have loved to have a mother to come and help with things.
When I had my son (second marriage) my MIL came to stay and it was more work for me .She expected to be taken out to lunch and cooked for...
My first MIL helped out by taken my first baby for the whole first week I was home. I was exhausted and had a bad reaction to the anethesia. It was wonderful. And she helped take care of the first when I had the second. Again wonderful.

Bjbaxter

Yes, all three times. I think my daughter would have been upset if I couldn't come. My Mom came and helped me when I had my children.

BobbiG

Volunteer, but don't let your feelings be hurt if they think they can do it without your help. Follow their lead and let them know all they have to do is yell. Is this your daughter or son? If it's your DDIL, and you'll have to travel, wait for the baby to be a couple of months old.

catrancher

I would ask if they want you to come and see what they say. My mom and dad came when I had my first baby. They were more trouble than help. They were not supportive of breast feeding and they were critical of everything I did with the new baby. My first, and as a youngest, I didn't have a lot of experience. I was in tears nearly every day. So . . . all of that to say that if you go to help out? Help, don't hinder. Best to keep one's opinions to onesself and help with the baby, the housework, and the cooking so mom and dad can get some sleep. BTW, when I had my next baby, I asked them not to come. It was so much easier on all of us.

Bluequilter

We live in Wisconsin and my daughter & family live in PA - when baby no. 1 came, they happened to be living in the UK - when baby # 2 came, I was asked to help out and stayed for 3 weeks. I has happy to help out.

Great-great granny

Congrats on the upcoming event.

What are the moms thoughts on this - has SHE voiced her wishes for you to be in the del. room? You should definetly be at the hosp. if possible & in the del room if she wants you there. But just my opinion.

Nearly 5 yrs. ago I had the privilege to be invited to be in the del. room with my 1st great-grand dgtr to see my 1st great-great grandchild born. (had also been there when the GGD was born.)

How blessed is that. :thumbup: :P

cowpie2

I went at week 3 after my DIL and Son's first was born. By then all the visitors had gone and they were exhausted. So I quickly volunteered for the morning (5:00- whenever) shift so they could get extra sleep. Make for some great one on one time for this grandma and the new momma was very grateful to catch up on some sleep.