Treasureit

I agree that others shouldn't be our dictators, but sometimes their unsolicited advice causes us to rethink our priorities and then we can take what is right and apply it and what doesn't fit - toss it.

duckydo

What gives her the right to discuss your finances? It sounds like a little jealousy on her part. She should be happy for your happiness, if having fabric makes you happy she should be happy for you. Maybe you should laugh at her and tell her "Well it keeps me out of the taverns" LOL that is what my husband tells folks that don't understand my fabric obsession

Shirleyg

I tell family members and friends that say things like that to me that I am investing in something I love to do. I don't hang out in bars, spend money on movies and going out with friends and that I choose to spend my money on something that will give give me hours of pleasure and could be profitable if I choose to sell some of my work.

mountain deb

I take it she will not be receiving any quilted items from you in the future? I doubt she will appreciate them.

nursie76

I agree with the others. She doesn't pay your bills or support you, so MYOB.
I also agree that when someone is unhappy, depressed, hurting, it sometimes comes out in picking at others. You are so compassionate, you are trying to find the root reason for her tirade and that speaks volumes about what a generous nature you have. If she is/was a nurse, used to caring for people, being in charge of others as well as herself, then this nastiness may well be partially stemming from an attempt to feel in control again. BUT, that does not excuse it.

I think that just letting it roll off your back is a good idea, but perhaps a gentle, "Really, I have a handle on my finances, not to worry." Wouldn't be out of line.

Take care, God Bless, and don't forget to post pics of your Hot Wheels quilt when it's finished.

{{{HUGS}}}

rilene

"I wanted to go to mill outlet(Clinton,NC) to just look at fabric}. And also walmart. She went off on me, stating the fact that I was crazy in trying to get more fabric, which she knows I have a stash here at home. she said, use what you have then get more later. (I did find a hotwheels material, at walmart, going to make a lap quilt for a boy)."

She just doesn't get it. Too bad for her - her life is less rich than yours. There's no way to convince people like this that your hobby/art is important.

pumpkinpatchquilter

Ouch, to be honest I don't even know how I would handle that situation. I think your SIL really had no business telling you how to spend your money. However, I also know that family doesn't always mind their business when they should, and the simple fact that they ARE family makes it even more difficult. If she does it again I would let her know you care about her and respect her opinion, but how you spend your money is your business and yours alone, and ask her to kindly keep those comments to herself. I have had a hard time in life learning how to approach these things without getting into a big fight, so I really feel for you!

If it makes you feel better, I am a SAHM of two children with a third on the way. Needless to say we live on one income, with the exeption of what I earn several days a week babysitting. Seems everyone has an opinion on what we do and how we do it. Either I don't work hard enough because I don't have a job, or I have no life because I'm home with the kids, or we somehow don't do enough for our kids because we don't spend hundreds of dollars on new clothes for them each year, or my kids aren't independent enough because I'm home so much...ugh. I'll tell you what, I don't get my hair done, my nails done, we don't drive expensive cars nor do we wear expensive clothes...God forbid, while I do spend a portion of money each year on new clothes, most of my kids play clothes come from thrift shops and yard sales. The one thing I do splurge on is my quilting. I buy the best fabric I can afford because I LIKE it, and I do it without shame. Our bills are always paid, though it may not be in the order or manner that others would prefer, my kids don't want for anything, and I think if I didn't get to splurge once or twice a month on fabric I might go nutty! It's nobody's business but my own and my Husband's and luckily he has his own hobby so he understands.

Some people don't get it but at the end of the day it's YOUR life and you've got nobody to please but yourself. I guess I'm getting to this point in my life where I'm just over other people and all their opinions. To be frank I think people need to learn how to just SHUT UP. LOL* You know how they say patience is a virtue? Well so is SILENCE. LOL*

Lori S

I often have people comment on my fabric purchases. Little comments , like "are you really going to use that ...soon", or "don't you have enough?". My response is ... you are right these are tough times but if it was not for my quilting ... I am not sure what I would do with my time., ....or I would rather spend the money on fabric and have something to show for it than ... going to the movies, eating at resteraunts, casinos, etc.
For those who particulary offend me in their comments , I say , "would you like me to shop in your closest for ISSUES, please leave the door closed on mine , and I will keep the door closed on yours."

katlady

Don't let her get to you. That is your relxation, you kow what you can spend. Don't tell her anything about what you spend next time.

mhansen6

What you buy with your money is your own business. But that said you may not want to get your feelings hurt again so I wouldn't go fabric shopping with her. My sister is somewhat they same way. I found that it is just easier on my feelings if I don't go fabric shopping with her. She doesn't understand my hobby and she doesn't want a quilt. So I don't shop with her and I haven't yet given her a quilt. Other than that she is a pretty good sister.