Mom's with daughters I need your advice again....You will love this one
#152
Super Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: High Entropy Zone
Posts: 1,247
Originally Posted by elizabeth
would you object to an all day boy/girl party with supervision? If not, let her go. I think it freaks people out when they hear boy, girl, all night, party in one sentence. BUT, I never had a daughter.
Believe it or not, gender has nothing to do with many responses except that the female usually pays for mistakes for the next 18+ years the hard way. Male children are no less vulnerable because they might make those same mistakes and need to take responsibility for their actions as well. I do not need to cite statistics on birth control to tell you there are only two methods that are 100% effective and they are abstinance and sterilization.
Parents should not have to be a child's friend or be blackmailed by society into thinking that they should. I think that is where many of us make the big mistakes. Your childs friends are peers, parents are teachers of values, etc.
#153
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 327
Originally Posted by lab fairy
Originally Posted by elizabeth
would you object to an all day boy/girl party with supervision? If not, let her go. I think it freaks people out when they hear boy, girl, all night, party in one sentence. BUT, I never had a daughter.
Believe it or not, gender has nothing to do with many responses except that the female usually pays for mistakes for the next 18+ years the hard way. Male children are no less vulnerable because they might make those same mistakes and need to take responsibility for their actions as well. I do not need to cite statistics on birth control to tell you there are only two methods that are 100% effective and they are abstinance and sterilization.
Parents should not have to be a child's friend or be blackmailed by society into thinking that they should. I think that is where many of us make the big mistakes. Your childs friends are peers, parents are teachers of values, etc.
#154
Super Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: High Entropy Zone
Posts: 1,247
Originally Posted by moonwolf23
Originally Posted by lab fairy
Originally Posted by elizabeth
would you object to an all day boy/girl party with supervision? If not, let her go. I think it freaks people out when they hear boy, girl, all night, party in one sentence. BUT, I never had a daughter.
Believe it or not, gender has nothing to do with many responses except that the female usually pays for mistakes for the next 18+ years the hard way. Male children are no less vulnerable because they might make those same mistakes and need to take responsibility for their actions as well. I do not need to cite statistics on birth control to tell you there are only two methods that are 100% effective and they are abstinance and sterilization.
Parents should not have to be a child's friend or be blackmailed by society into thinking that they should. I think that is where many of us make the big mistakes. Your childs friends are peers, parents are teachers of values, etc.
I'm not going to argue with you. You are entitled to your opinion. I just hope if you have children that you know the facts (not Oprah junk science but REAL information). A great visual of all the untreatable STD's, financial spreadsheet of the cost of raising a child to the age of 18 and frank discussions are really useful. I've had a few throw up with the visuals. A picture is worth a 1000 words. Nothing is worse than explaining to a young lady HOW she ended up pregnant because no one told her at home. Her parents expected the school to do their parenting. Pass the buck, pass the child, sad world.
#155
Originally Posted by lab fairy
Originally Posted by elizabeth
would you object to an all day boy/girl party with supervision? If not, let her go. I think it freaks people out when they hear boy, girl, all night, party in one sentence. BUT, I never had a daughter.
Believe it or not, gender has nothing to do with many responses except that the female usually pays for mistakes for the next 18+ years the hard way. Male children are no less vulnerable because they might make those same mistakes and need to take responsibility for their actions as well. I do not need to cite statistics on birth control to tell you there are only two methods that are 100% effective and they are abstinance and sterilization.
Parents should not have to be a child's friend or be blackmailed by society into thinking that they should. I think that is where many of us make the big mistakes. Your childs friends are peers, parents are teachers of values, etc.
#156
Super Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: High Entropy Zone
Posts: 1,247
Originally Posted by IrishNY
Originally Posted by lab fairy
Originally Posted by elizabeth
would you object to an all day boy/girl party with supervision? If not, let her go. I think it freaks people out when they hear boy, girl, all night, party in one sentence. BUT, I never had a daughter.
Believe it or not, gender has nothing to do with many responses except that the female usually pays for mistakes for the next 18+ years the hard way. Male children are no less vulnerable because they might make those same mistakes and need to take responsibility for their actions as well. I do not need to cite statistics on birth control to tell you there are only two methods that are 100% effective and they are abstinance and sterilization.
Parents should not have to be a child's friend or be blackmailed by society into thinking that they should. I think that is where many of us make the big mistakes. Your childs friends are peers, parents are teachers of values, etc.
#157
Tonight is homecoming and she looked beautiful. All dressed up in highheels and hair done. I took her to get Mani/Pedis and had the best day with her. We drove her to her friends house where they sleepover is being held and low and behold I was not the only mother who would not let their daughter/son stay over. So I felt good about say she could stay for the Smor's cookout but needs to come home. I am so proud of her that she came to me and told me that there would be boys there and that she agreed with me that it was not ok. We had a blast today and tonight she is having fun!! I took lots of pictures and love how beautiful she looked. Thank you all for your advice it really helped to have so many moms/dads tell me what you would do. If not for experience where would i be!!! Jade
#158
Junior Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Upper Michigan!
Posts: 167
I also said I wouldn't allow a sleepover at 17. Call it any kind of party you want, hold it any time of the day or night, I still think many are too immature to handle it at 17. Yes, it depends on the child how mature they may be but these days, some of the PARENTS don't even act maturely. Research has shown that children need, and want, guidelines and boundaries. Some may ask, not because they really want to go, but to test the waters or because their best friend is standing next to them. Peer pressure is very powerful and secretly they may be hoping for a "no" answer.
Even if I err on the side of caution and not allow her to go, missing one party is not going to kill her. But going to that party just may.....
Even if I err on the side of caution and not allow her to go, missing one party is not going to kill her. But going to that party just may.....
#160
My daughter is 43 & a very successful business woman and I'm very, very proud of her accomplishments. She grew up during the 70's/80's when drugs were the "thing to do". I remember some really awful fights with her because she thought she could "handle" things on her own. I didn't give an inch & I've never been sorry. It comes down to the fact that you love her & want her to be safe & you should follow your instincts on this.
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