The mooching person who wants to quilt
#71
Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 81
When she comes over , and wants to go through your stash just say not today. I really don't feel like it. I had a hectic work week and am not in the mood to go in there and go through my stash with you. Period. Also when she starts ragging about how poor she is. Say do you eat every day and have a roof over your head. Then you are rich. End of subject. If she stares at you walk away .
#72
Originally Posted by Lacelady
Since diplomacy doesn't seem to be working, do you have a place where you could put a lot of your stash (stuff that you absolutely want to keep for yourself and not have to fight for it). Leave what you are prepared to share where it has always been.
If she comments that suddenly you don't have so much, you don't have to reply to that, just change the subject.
If she comments that suddenly you don't have so much, you don't have to reply to that, just change the subject.
#73
Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Iowa
Posts: 475
Been there as well. Show her what she can choose from and if she doesn't like it, well then tell her where she can go and purchase what she likes. Those of us who have been there have worked Twice as hard to get back up. There is no excuse for rudeness.
#74
Banned
Join Date: May 2009
Location: LA - Lower Alabama
Posts: 888
I said before - this woman is being exceedingly rude because you LET HER DO IT.
It's YOUR STUFF - you do NOT have to apologize to her because she doesn't have YOUR STUFF - it's YOUR STUFF
It's YOUR HOUSE, YOUR STUFF, where does she get off rummaging through YOUR HOUSE AND YOUR STUFF....
doh
It's YOUR STUFF - you do NOT have to apologize to her because she doesn't have YOUR STUFF - it's YOUR STUFF
It's YOUR HOUSE, YOUR STUFF, where does she get off rummaging through YOUR HOUSE AND YOUR STUFF....
doh
#75
Originally Posted by Rebecca VLQ
Originally Posted by CoyoteQuilts
I'd probably tell her I am rich because I am greedy and won't share! Like a little kid, 'IT'S MINE!'
This made me laugh.
#76
Originally Posted by sewTinker
Maybe you can tell her that you will make her a going away box and will give it to her when you move. If she requests specific fabrics just smile and say, "oh the box will be Full of surprises!" You can give her fabrics you no longer want, and scraps, and a scrappy pattern (printed from the internet), and tie is all up with a big bow. This will set a good example, help your DIL save face, and make her proud of you too! Everyone will win. :-)
#77
Originally Posted by joan_quilts
Ok, I will try to explain the best that I can what I mean by the mooching person.
My son is married to a wonderful girl. Her mom is 55, 10 years older than me, and grew up poor in a large family. Her dad died when she was little, so the older kids helped out with the younger kids.
We live in a very rural area and everyone is somehow related to each other, etc. I am NOT from here so I have had to adapt to the way people are here. Still haven't but I have tried! LOL
Anyways, Evelyn, the mooch, is always telling me how priveledged I am, and how many wonderful things I have, and I must be "rich" and I have no clue what it is like to be poor.
Ok, dh and I have worked hard for what we have! NOBODY gave us anything! We do have a nice home, nothing fancy, but nice and we own 2 descent vehichles. That does not make me rich or not understand about money! I have been poor, a few times, and therefore by the grace of God, things got better.
Anyways, she came over to make a baby quilt for her grandson. Ok, I can be kind and share what I have since she is sooooo poor. This woman saves used wrapping paper and eats mayonaise that expired a year ago! She is not poor now, but she thinks she is.
Well, she goes through my stash the other day, which ticked me off because she acts like it is hers. Then she says that I won't be needing all my fabric since dh and I are planning on moving to Florida next year. She could just use my stuff and help me out! HUH?!
I can get along with this woman for the sake of keeping peace in the family but she drives me nuts! She and her husband are a bit odd, but I try so hard to keep my mouth shut because I don't want my dil to feel bad. She knows how her mom is and always appologizes for her. I told her not to worry.
I am not going to just let her come to my home and help herself to what is mine. Being tactful doesn't work with this woman and I am going to have to be firm. Maybe I will put out a donation jar! LOL I tried explaining to her some of my fabric was expensive and I am saving it for my own use. She just stares at me like "so"?
Any ideas?
My son is married to a wonderful girl. Her mom is 55, 10 years older than me, and grew up poor in a large family. Her dad died when she was little, so the older kids helped out with the younger kids.
We live in a very rural area and everyone is somehow related to each other, etc. I am NOT from here so I have had to adapt to the way people are here. Still haven't but I have tried! LOL
Anyways, Evelyn, the mooch, is always telling me how priveledged I am, and how many wonderful things I have, and I must be "rich" and I have no clue what it is like to be poor.
Ok, dh and I have worked hard for what we have! NOBODY gave us anything! We do have a nice home, nothing fancy, but nice and we own 2 descent vehichles. That does not make me rich or not understand about money! I have been poor, a few times, and therefore by the grace of God, things got better.
Anyways, she came over to make a baby quilt for her grandson. Ok, I can be kind and share what I have since she is sooooo poor. This woman saves used wrapping paper and eats mayonaise that expired a year ago! She is not poor now, but she thinks she is.
Well, she goes through my stash the other day, which ticked me off because she acts like it is hers. Then she says that I won't be needing all my fabric since dh and I are planning on moving to Florida next year. She could just use my stuff and help me out! HUH?!
I can get along with this woman for the sake of keeping peace in the family but she drives me nuts! She and her husband are a bit odd, but I try so hard to keep my mouth shut because I don't want my dil to feel bad. She knows how her mom is and always appologizes for her. I told her not to worry.
I am not going to just let her come to my home and help herself to what is mine. Being tactful doesn't work with this woman and I am going to have to be firm. Maybe I will put out a donation jar! LOL I tried explaining to her some of my fabric was expensive and I am saving it for my own use. She just stares at me like "so"?
Any ideas?
#78
Try explaining to her that it didn't all fall on you in one day, and that you have a purpose for it all, if not only for packing material when you move!! Maybe try taking her the LQS and she'll get a grip on the cost. Or try just making your sewing room off limits!! Easier said that done, though.
#80
Sounds like my SIL. She and her husband, my BIL, both quit school and have no education and have never had a decent job. My DH has a college education which he got through the GI Bill. Every time we get together she is always talking about how "rich" we are. We are a long way from that but we do get by.
No one can take advantage of you it you don't let them. I would be very firm and tell her what she can or cannot have. If she gets mad, so be it. She'll get over it. As long as she thinks she can get what she wants from you she will continue. Hang in there and be firm.
No one can take advantage of you it you don't let them. I would be very firm and tell her what she can or cannot have. If she gets mad, so be it. She'll get over it. As long as she thinks she can get what she wants from you she will continue. Hang in there and be firm.
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