The Oddness of Estate Sales
04-23-2011, 12:54 PM
#81
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 862
This is a really interesting thread, but if you have lost everything in some calamity, you get that stuff is stuff. The important things might be the journals, the photos and yes, to family members, the quilts (artwork). Everything else is just stuff - maybe you loved it, maybe you just didn't feel the need to spend more money to replace it?
I love auctions, but given that I will be downsizing, don't need anything, so I just go along with my sister. While I really need new furniture, I hesitate because I always have to think...will this fit into a smaller place and what will I get rid of to make space for it? What I hate about auctions and estate sales is the other customers. You know the ones who loudly proclaim something as junk or crap. Given that the owner of the stuff might be right there, doesn't say much for the manners of folks in the area. If you don't want it, why not keep it to yourself?
I love auctions, but given that I will be downsizing, don't need anything, so I just go along with my sister. While I really need new furniture, I hesitate because I always have to think...will this fit into a smaller place and what will I get rid of to make space for it? What I hate about auctions and estate sales is the other customers. You know the ones who loudly proclaim something as junk or crap. Given that the owner of the stuff might be right there, doesn't say much for the manners of folks in the area. If you don't want it, why not keep it to yourself?
04-23-2011, 08:43 PM
#82
Super Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: St Pauls, NC
Posts: 2,470
Janet, my heart goes out to you and your family. My husband lost his brother to Alz, his baby brother is now losing ground more quickly with same thing, my husband is also into stage of dimentia. Truly understand your emotions.
Regarding the estate sales, I also find it sad at times. The truth is that the family MAY need the proceeds to take care of the family expenses. At any rate, if you care enough to purchase the item, apparently it means more to you than the family members left. I walked into a house one day to inspect it for a real estate appraisal. You could tell the owner left in an emergency situation and no one came back to straighten up. It just about took my breath and I could not wait to get out of there. I have walked into several houses and felt the sadness and pain in that house. Spooky!!!! The last time that happened, as soon as my son and I were out of that house, I started to comment to him. He shook his head and said "you don't have to say a thing...now I know what you told me about some houses having a feeling of sadness" .
Will keep your family in my prayers!
Regarding the estate sales, I also find it sad at times. The truth is that the family MAY need the proceeds to take care of the family expenses. At any rate, if you care enough to purchase the item, apparently it means more to you than the family members left. I walked into a house one day to inspect it for a real estate appraisal. You could tell the owner left in an emergency situation and no one came back to straighten up. It just about took my breath and I could not wait to get out of there. I have walked into several houses and felt the sadness and pain in that house. Spooky!!!! The last time that happened, as soon as my son and I were out of that house, I started to comment to him. He shook his head and said "you don't have to say a thing...now I know what you told me about some houses having a feeling of sadness" .
Will keep your family in my prayers!
Originally Posted by JanetM
I agree with you completely. I feel as if I am invading the privacy of someone I have never met, and it makes me uncomfortable.
It is not unlike having to settle my in-laws estate when my MIl passed away. I remember bringing home her purse and clothes from the hospital. At one point, I went through her purse and even said to my husband that I felt I shouldn't violate her in that way.
Clearing their home of their 50+ years of collecting was so difficult. All of us chose something in remembrance with the rest going to charity. I thought to myself...is that it?..the sum total of our lives is our stuff?, and when it is disposed of it is as if the person never existed.
Oh boy, I shouldn't have started this. I am a bit emotional right now because my Mom is dying. She has Alzheimer's and in the last week has taken a turn for the worse. My sister and I have tried to prepare ourselves for this, but now that it seems very close, I'm finding it very difficult.
It is not unlike having to settle my in-laws estate when my MIl passed away. I remember bringing home her purse and clothes from the hospital. At one point, I went through her purse and even said to my husband that I felt I shouldn't violate her in that way.
Clearing their home of their 50+ years of collecting was so difficult. All of us chose something in remembrance with the rest going to charity. I thought to myself...is that it?..the sum total of our lives is our stuff?, and when it is disposed of it is as if the person never existed.
Oh boy, I shouldn't have started this. I am a bit emotional right now because my Mom is dying. She has Alzheimer's and in the last week has taken a turn for the worse. My sister and I have tried to prepare ourselves for this, but now that it seems very close, I'm finding it very difficult.
04-23-2011, 09:04 PM
#83
Super Member
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Ohio
Posts: 1,299
No, my stuff is not in any kind of order that my husband could sift through. But my friends and I all have agreements to take care of that sort of thing for each other should one of us die. In my weaver's guild the stuff is usually offered for sale. My husand knows who to call for this if something should happen.
04-24-2011, 12:30 AM
#84
Super Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 1,325
Originally Posted by kittenquilts
I totally understand what you mean. I got some fabric and quilt tops at an estate sale. I can't help but think of the person who did all the lovely work on them. They are just tops - not quilted yet. I did complete one recently - added borders and did the quilting on my long arm. I think of the person who put all those hours into this quilt top and hope I have done her justice in the completion.
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