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-   -   Who is next to leave? (https://www.quiltingboard.com/general-chit-chat-non-quilting-talk-f7/who-next-leave-t59404.html)

Rhonda 08-14-2010 09:27 PM


Originally Posted by pookie ookie
Sorry to lose you, Pam.

The PDA thing should probably be explained to everyone! When they show up in "Recent Posts," they seem a little out of place. A personal rant or whine makes sense when you realize it's basically a journal entry. That's what diarists do. If I had known about PDAs, I wouldn't tell people to buck up, buttercup. Diarists want commiseration not solutions. As an empiricist, I'll be careful not to post on them in the future.

An Ignore function would solve everyone's problems. It's funny that the Buddy List came before the Ignore List. It's usually the other way around.

I'm sorry you feel the PDA is only a rant where we want people to commiserate.

I was the first one to start my PDA when it was started and I am still active on it. I have used it to list my links so people can see them in one place. I have had many fun conversations with friends and we laugh alot in there, I am not a negative person. I get enough of that from my DH and my mom. I like to be upbeat and I am not looking for anything other than time with my friends. It is just a place where I can talk without worrying if I am highjacking someone else's thread. I can ramble on as long as I want and I am not getting in anyone's way.

The PDAs are not liked by all but then we are all differant so it is ok with me if someone doesnt like them. I happen to enjoy mine and my friends. It is a chance to see what is going on in those lives. Everyone is welcome in Rhonda's Retreat any time you like! Just click on the PDA link in the list at the bottom of the pages and come on in and check out what is going on in the neighborhood! When there is something important we put it in the title so you can go right to the relevant page. It's just fun!

From time to time I tell anecdotes of things I remember from when I was growing up and I talk about my grands etc. I like to post pics in there of my babies! There is a whole lot more than just the sad things in life that happen to us all at one time or another. Support is important too when we go through bad times.

dglvr 08-14-2010 10:23 PM

Thanks Rhonda for that. I think the PDA is a great place. I haven't posted anything in it yet but it is nice to see what people are up to in their lives. Its great to share. But just because it is offered here doesn't mean you have to go in and read what people are posting in it if you don't want to.
I love this quiltboard. Its the only one I belong to. Who has time for anymore than this one. Its always packed full of wonderful pictures, ideas, jokes, recipes, helpful tips and smiles.
I love it here. :thumbup:

Rusty's Mama 08-14-2010 10:49 PM

Well stated, Rhonda. I just recently clicked on the PDA link and read several with interest. I also contacted one person because of what she had written on her PDA and found a wonderful, supportive person that I would not have known about otherwise. The other part of this board - if you don't want to read something or participant in a topic - let it go! There sure isn't time to do it all - but I am so pleased with the site and feel fortunate to have stumbled on it. Just like with guilds where people come and go, I would assume this and other sites will be the same - we all come and go as time and life permits!

ljsunflower 08-14-2010 11:04 PM


Originally Posted by Rusty's Mama
Well stated, Rhonda. I just recently clicked on the PDA link and read several with interest. I also contacted one person because of what she had written on her PDA and found a wonderful, supportive person that I would not have known about otherwise. The other part of this board - if you don't want to read something or participant in a topic - let it go! There sure isn't time to do it all - but I am so pleased with the site and feel fortunate to have stumbled on it. Just like with guilds where people come and go, I would assume this and other sites will be the same - we all come and go as time and life permits!

Yes, we do come & go from here & other forums. But why is it that there are some who have to ANNOUNCE that they are leaving or might leave or are thinking about leaving? Why don't they just go?? Because they want someone to talk them into staying? Or are they just trying to stir up more controversy on the forum?

C.Cal Quilt Girl 08-14-2010 11:19 PM

Have not been here long in comparison to some of you, and have enjoyed the experience, Have no doubt I can step on toes with opinions, none are meant to be hateful, I figure we all see things differently. If I have, P.M. and let me know, we can chat things out in private.
Have not gone in to PDA too much would hate to intrude, thats part of the reason I enjoy the open forum. Kind of a slow chat, gives more of a chance to anwser, and I can read thru somtimes without getting lost. Have seen buddy list, but not sure how to use. :)

ashlett 08-14-2010 11:24 PM

I`m not leaving, do not post a huge amount due to being very busy at this time of year with our Forest ponies. Also my sewing room is having a major re-vamp. I will post pictures when it is finished. Our houses here tend to be much smaller than yours, unless we are rich, so my sewing room is compact and has to be carefully planned. :)

barbrdunn 08-14-2010 11:35 PM


Originally Posted by cjomomma
I'm not going anywhere. I enjoy this forum and everyone on it. But I will say I have had some that tried to convince me to leave.

Why in the world would someone want you to leave? I don't understand that. I have never seen anything really negative here, but do not go to the PDA or chat rooms. If you want to be here, good for you...I hope you stay!

Beth33 08-15-2010 12:34 AM


Originally Posted by pookie ookie

An Ignore function would solve everyone's problems. It's funny that the Buddy List came before the Ignore List. It's usually the other way around.

Ditto - exactly what we need :thumbup:

patricej 08-15-2010 12:38 AM

most of the PDAs (publicly posted personal journals) are used by members to share and talk about personal things that just don't fit anywhere else on the board. they're usually upbeat, with the occassional "having a bad day, please cheer me up" thrown in. much the same thing you'd find if you were gathering daily for coffee with your buddies.

i have heard reports that some PDAs are/have been used by members to post and trade vicious gossip and other snarky remarks. they must be rare, otherwise my inbox would be flooded with complaints. the very few members who might be abusing the PDA in that manner might also be doing us a favor. they expose themselves as the sort of people we don't want to hang around with, and so we learn to ignore them - with or without a special button. ;-)

it's true. members do come and go. 99% of the time they leave because something else demands the lion's share of their time. occassionally somebody leaves because they aren't having fun here anymore. in very rare cases somebody leaves in a huff. and, unfortunately, once in a while, somebody leaves in tears.

we can't fix problems - harrassment being just one example - we don't know about. the perpetrators usually use the private message feature. if the target member doesn't tell us, we can't help. we are usually as surprised as everyone else to find that a member has been driven away, and that it's took late to prevent it. so far, i know of only two specific cases. whether or not we can fix it remains to be seen.

there were some serious problems in the chat room. people have gotten so used to the facebook behavior model and to the general "wild west outlaw" internet mentality that they sometimes forget to use their inside voices and good manners when they join into our conversations there. chatters can fix that faster than Admin or the moderators can because they are right there when it happens. we find out later when it's usually too late to take effective action.

think of chat as though it was a neighborhood block part. if some obnoxious, loudmouthed thug shows up and starts trying to pick a fight, ignore her/him. do not respond at all to their comments. pretend they are not there. they will usually get bored and move on. remember, they are trying to entertain themselves by getting everybody wrapped around the axle. deny them their fun and continue having yours. ;-)

take note of the username, the date and exact time they barged in and tried to wreck the party, and send Admin a pm with all of the specific details. then he has the information he needs to investigate and take the appropriate action.

but, i must emphasize, those are rare examples. it almost never happens. in nearly every case, if somebody isn't here anymore, they just aren't here. there's nothing more to it than that. no need for concern or worry.

i absolutely do NOT mean to criticize or complain that the question was posted. it's NOT a violation of any policy to have done so. unfortunately, on the other hand, such posts create the impression that the problem is chronic and widespread.

let me reassure you, please. our board is 99.99999985% fun, safe and effective for daily use. :thumbup:

campion 08-15-2010 01:09 AM

I don't go into chat room---had enough experience from a Family history site!! Not me but others---why can't people be nice to each other??
It won't keep me off this site there are too many good folks and loads of help---Thank you


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