A question of perspective about money... and movie tickets
06-28-2011, 10:34 AM
#81
Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Plainfield, IN
Posts: 390
I'm glad you're letting her go, and I'm glad you're putting a spin on it so she can gain some perspective on the "cost" of a seemingly small thing to those of us who are fortunate enough to have a little "play" money sometimes.
You're doing a really good job, Mom, and you'll be rewarded with the knowledge that you raised an excellent member of society. Keep up the good work. :)
You're doing a really good job, Mom, and you'll be rewarded with the knowledge that you raised an excellent member of society. Keep up the good work. :)
06-28-2011, 10:42 AM
#82
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Orchard Park, NY (near Buffalo, which is near Niagara Falls)
Posts: 3,884
She is my "arrow shot into the future".
What I am able to teach her, she will likely teach to her own children someday. Attitudes and values transcend the fashions of the day.
What I am able to teach her, she will likely teach to her own children someday. Attitudes and values transcend the fashions of the day.
06-28-2011, 05:40 PM
#84
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Northern Kentucky
Posts: 521
Tell her you will pay the six dollars and however much a drink and popcorn costs at the second theatre. If she wants to go to theatre number one, she will need to pay the difference. That way you are allowing her to make the decision and learn the value of money and spending it wisely. At 14, she probably doesn't have a job, but I could always finds ways for my kids to earn money around the house (they did not get an allowance - no one pays me just for being a part of the family!)
06-28-2011, 06:53 PM
#85
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Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 3,357
Originally Posted by Favorite Fabrics
In our area, it's the rule that you cannot bring in food and drink from outside.
DH decided that this isn't the hill we want to die on... and so she can go with her friends to the expensive theater but there is a catch.
And it's thanks to an idea that was offered here! :idea:
She has to come with me several times this summer, to volunteer at a local food pantry. This is so that she understands that the price of a movie ticket - whether expensive or cheaper - represents enough money that it would really be a hardship for some people.
So that she has fun... and also keeps growing in heart.
DH decided that this isn't the hill we want to die on... and so she can go with her friends to the expensive theater but there is a catch.
And it's thanks to an idea that was offered here! :idea:
She has to come with me several times this summer, to volunteer at a local food pantry. This is so that she understands that the price of a movie ticket - whether expensive or cheaper - represents enough money that it would really be a hardship for some people.
So that she has fun... and also keeps growing in heart.
:D
06-29-2011, 01:34 PM
#86
Super Member
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Northeast IL
Posts: 2,064
Originally Posted by Favorite Fabrics
What I am able to teach her, she will likely teach to her own children someday. Attitudes and values transcend the fashions of the day.
06-29-2011, 03:02 PM
#87
Super Member
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 1,625
Originally Posted by Favorite Fabrics
In our area, it's the rule that you cannot bring in food and drink from outside.
DH decided that this isn't the hill we want to die on... and so she can go with her friends to the expensive theater but there is a catch.
And it's thanks to an idea that was offered here! :idea:
She has to come with me several times this summer, to volunteer at a local food pantry. This is so that she understands that the price of a movie ticket - whether expensive or cheaper - represents enough money that it would really be a hardship for some people.
So that she has fun... and also keeps growing in heart.
DH decided that this isn't the hill we want to die on... and so she can go with her friends to the expensive theater but there is a catch.
And it's thanks to an idea that was offered here! :idea:
She has to come with me several times this summer, to volunteer at a local food pantry. This is so that she understands that the price of a movie ticket - whether expensive or cheaper - represents enough money that it would really be a hardship for some people.
So that she has fun... and also keeps growing in heart.
I must compliment you and your husband on the solution you came up with. It is a wonderful idea. She gets what she wants and you still get to impress upon her that there are those out there who cannot even afford the price of a ticket yet alone a meal.
06-30-2011, 10:29 AM
#88
Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Troy, MI
Posts: 95
Two things -
One Thing - The theaters lose out on me - I buy no snacks away from home. For 90 minute movies, I can do without.
Second Thing - I FEEL for you Favorite Fabrics. Raising children today is extra difficult. Gratification (usually instant) is the NEW NORMAL. You are a good mom and I applaud your sensitivity to $$$ vs. need vs. "have to have". Good luck in all that you do.
One Thing - The theaters lose out on me - I buy no snacks away from home. For 90 minute movies, I can do without.
Second Thing - I FEEL for you Favorite Fabrics. Raising children today is extra difficult. Gratification (usually instant) is the NEW NORMAL. You are a good mom and I applaud your sensitivity to $$$ vs. need vs. "have to have". Good luck in all that you do.
06-30-2011, 04:54 PM
#89
Super Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Chili, New York (Rochester)
Posts: 1,147
I am the mother of four daughters. First, they are female and master manipulators. They don't realize it most of the time, but they are. Lots of times they use their tears for that very purpose. Yeah, yeah, we never understand, do we?
The advice given here is very good, especially about having each girl pay her own way. If that is agreeable, you foot the gas bill. As for snacks, we NEVER bought snacks. We either put stuff in our purses, or ate before we left. They can go 2-3 hours without food but the best is to carry some in with you. The theatre really could care less!!
The advice given here is very good, especially about having each girl pay her own way. If that is agreeable, you foot the gas bill. As for snacks, we NEVER bought snacks. We either put stuff in our purses, or ate before we left. They can go 2-3 hours without food but the best is to carry some in with you. The theatre really could care less!!
07-02-2011, 09:23 AM
#90
Banned
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: England
Posts: 2,365
Originally Posted by dakotamaid
quote "I don't think every.single.thing has to be a lesson. Sometimes a teenage girl needs to be a teenage girl. The occasional selfish act does not mean she's a selfish person, and I'm afraid if you try to force a charitable attitude on her, she'll rebel--because that's how teenagers operate.
If it were me, I'd make a bargain with her--IF she does something nice next weekend (volunteer somewhere, donate some of her belongings, etc), she can go to the fancy cinema when the movie comes out. If it's that important to her, I bet she'll do it, and feeling as if she has a voice in the matter could make a huge difference in her attitude."
I like this. I would try to teach a "lesson in life" all the time and many times it just didn't work. Sometimes kids have to be kids. :)
If it were me, I'd make a bargain with her--IF she does something nice next weekend (volunteer somewhere, donate some of her belongings, etc), she can go to the fancy cinema when the movie comes out. If it's that important to her, I bet she'll do it, and feeling as if she has a voice in the matter could make a huge difference in her attitude."
I like this. I would try to teach a "lesson in life" all the time and many times it just didn't work. Sometimes kids have to be kids. :)
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