raedar63

This is so true , I as well as my family are very subdued ,quiet people,I don't think if we hit the lotto we would jump around and squeel,but oh would we be happy!

And on another thought so many today are really really spoiled, yes I have been guilty in the past of spoiling my kids,but really when I see that some people get hundreds of dollars worth of stuff for christmas how does that teach us to appreciate anything? My family does not exchange gifts ,my mom and dad get a little something for everyone like a 30 dollar limit and we all give to mom and dad. For instance this year I recieved earrings and a new roasting pan. I am in the process of making my 6 nieces and nephews quilts , these kids have never had much . I never thought to make them anythig because most teens do not appreciate. Well I made my great nephew a scrap quilt and all the kids went on and on, and then the mom of the new one said "I still have the pillow quilt you made me when I was 4" I couldn't beleive she still had it.
Any way I didn't mean to get on a soapbox ,just wanted to point out how spoiled some are and we really shouldn't pour our love and time into gifts for those we know would not appreciate them because they get everything they could possibly ever need.

One more thing , there is never an excuse for rudeness!
Rae

amandasgramma

I'm with you on this. I have a former SIL that had a woman make me a photo album from purple satin. It had purple "slip" lace around the edges. The woman ran out of the lace, so added a different lace about 80% of the way around. It was the ugliest thing I've ever received....I have NOTHING purple in my house - I'm not fond of purple!!! (my livingroom colors were blue at the time)!!!!! Was it a joke gift -- I don't know!!!!!! So, I agree that you should know who you're going to spend a lotta time on, and make them stuff they would like. HOWEVER, the recipients, whether they like it or not should be classy and courteous and fake out a liking for the product. It's downright rude to be the way those people were about the purses. I was always taught to smile, act like I like something, and then re-gift it or give it to a thrift store. :) :)

quiltmaker

Oh how I agree with you. I will add another probably not so welcome point.....why do people have to constantly whine about their disappointments.....it gets so depressing to hear them...yes, I know I don't have to read them but somehow I look hoping some reason will come into the conversation. I thought this board was to be about the joy of quilting and learning from each other. There are so many posts about unhappiness over so many things that people have no control over that it truly is amazing to me. Sometimes I think this has become a place for people to vent out all their frustrations in their lives and what pleases and displeases them that the joy and love of quilting or creating whatever they do is a burden to them and think they might re-evaluate their priorities in life.

Truly I am not trying to offend anyone but it does make one pause and think.

justflyingin

Devil's advocate here...
But what if I don't like it and don't want your decorating style on my wall or on my bed? Does your taste have to control my life, my bedroom, my family or living room?

I've read that decorator items are the the thing most often given that aren't used.....and the advice I read (many many years ago) to avoid them when giving gifts. IOW, let the person decorate their own house.

If they put in an order, of course, that is different...

My sister had a MIL that constantly got upset if she ever got rid of anything that was given to her by the MIL. I felt so sorry for my sis. I live so far away no one ever know what I do with gifts... :)

justflyingin

That is sweet!!!!

peaceandjoy

What I try to remember is that, if I give a gift, I've GIVEN it away. It is now that person's to do with as they wish. If they don't like/want it, they can regift it, sell it, put it in the cupboard (worst choice, for me). If I didn't make sure before making a gift that it was an appropriate color, size, design, etc., that's not the receiver's fault - it's mine! I don't think I should carry and whine about it, and hopefully, I'd learn from the experience.

That said, I have a quilt and two pillows my late MIL made for me/us. They are, in my opinion, hideous. A dark blue that has faded to a strange grey, a wild floral calico with blue and neon yellow, and Pepto Bismal pink. There's nothing I like about any of the fabrics, nor the pattern (it's a sampler, the blocks that are applique are on muslin). Did I let her know that I didn't love it? Of course not. I put them in on top of a cedar chest, refolding periodically so blue would fade evenly, and after many, many years, put them in a closet. Maybe someday my children, who were very close to her, will want them. In the meantime, while I can't get rid of them, I don't have to decorate with them!

peaceandjoy

LOVED your blog post. So sad that many people do not say thank you today, I guess because they are not thankful. One need not be (dishonestly) gushing and saying they adore that specific item, but they should be able to sincerely say "Thank you." The "thank you" is for fact that a gift has been given, whether or not it is the recipient's taste. Whether selected out of many or personally made, it was for the recipient - and that is enough to be thankful for.

luvnquilt

I can see all sides in this post too. I think we need to remember that beauty is in the eye of the beholder so when we make something and find it lovely that may not be the case for anyone else!
And... The Mona Lisa once hung on the wall in someone's BATHROOM!!!!

justflyingin

Yeah, I don't think I'd want her gracing my living room, either! :) Or that painting with the farmer and his wife...looking sour...

Shari1967

I agree you have to know the person you are giving to. I've learned that lesson, maybe not the hard way but I've learned it.
My passion is really with photos and family history in photos, scrap booking, albums, etc... My MIL doesn't have that same appreciation. Even family photos. That was very hard for me to really swallow - I couldn't understand it (still don't) but the woman LOVES it if I make her something. Over the years I've weaved her a basket, made a table runner for her dining room, cross stitched an angel and this year I made her a rag wreath (talk about work!) She loved ALL that but she just rolls her eyes at anything with photos. Okay not literally but she just doesn't get excited about photos as gifts. She loves my photos but she just doesn't want them. My parents on the other hand love it when I pick a favorite photo whether of nature or family, frame it and give it to them. To each their own....ya just gotta learn what someone appreciates and follow that direction.