Can't finish my quilts
#1
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I’ve been sitting here thinking about my inability to finish my quilts. My excuse used to be that I had a sewing machine that was very temperamental when it came to quilting, so tops would be put aside because I couldn’t face the battle. Now I have a new machine that quilts beautifully and I’ve quilted several of my projects – but then they’ve been put aside again rather than bound and finished. On Leah Day’s Quilt Along this week, the subject is finishing a quilt, using a little wholecloth quilt that we’ve just made – and I’m conscious of a real reluctance to do it, though the quilt has come out far better than I could ever have hoped, and I’m thrilled with it.
So why this reluctance to see the finished results of all my hard work on this and other quilts? I’m puzzled, though I think it may lie somewhere in the past – for over 40 years I firmly believed I was useless at anything creative. I was told as much by teachers and others, and was in the shadow of a very creatively talented sister. I was only rescued from that by a dear friend who, 8 years ago, patiently taught me to quilt, having a lot more confidence in me than I had in myself. You’d think that would make me eager to finish my work – every completed project proves the critics wrong and underlines my creative abilities. But there’s still this deep reluctance to get on and do it.
Can anyone else relate to this? Has anyone dealt with similar issues? Any thoughts?
So why this reluctance to see the finished results of all my hard work on this and other quilts? I’m puzzled, though I think it may lie somewhere in the past – for over 40 years I firmly believed I was useless at anything creative. I was told as much by teachers and others, and was in the shadow of a very creatively talented sister. I was only rescued from that by a dear friend who, 8 years ago, patiently taught me to quilt, having a lot more confidence in me than I had in myself. You’d think that would make me eager to finish my work – every completed project proves the critics wrong and underlines my creative abilities. But there’s still this deep reluctance to get on and do it.
Can anyone else relate to this? Has anyone dealt with similar issues? Any thoughts?
#2
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I don't know about you, but for me, what I do is like my children and when I finish them completely it is difficult to let the 'go.' They are my precious ones and I really don't want others judging them. I was also told how I was lacking in soooo many skills, so now I have to rephrase those messages in order to move on. Not an easy task.
I do finish all my charity projects and that is OK.
Let me know what works for you. Maybe it will work for me too.
ali
I do finish all my charity projects and that is OK.
Let me know what works for you. Maybe it will work for me too.
ali
#3
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When folks try to tell me I can't do something, I do it just to prove them wrong! When I first started quilting two yrs ago my DH told me the Dresden Star block was too far advanced for me. I got upset, so I put one together just to show him I could & I made a beautiful tote bag for my granddaughter out of it for Christmas that year! It's not about what others think of your skills, it's how you value yourself that counts!! Have fun with whatever you apply yourself to!! :-)
#4
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If you post pictures of your near finished quilts, I am sure you will get a ton of compliments and then will feel ready to finish them. Instead of thinking about finishing them, think about the fun of binding them. Some people hate binding but I absolutely love doing the binding. It is one of my favorite steps. It is relaxing, not taxing and can be done in front of the television. Try to have fun with it.
#5
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Perhaps you are suffering from clinical depression. The inability to finish anything is one the signs and symptoms of depression. I have suffered from depression for many years and have been on anti-depressants for years. Perhaps it's time to see your doctor.
#6
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Yes, I can relate! I have a "Super Sister" creative genius! Really! But the older I get the more I realize that we are 2 different people and so what if I am not as creative as she? This is what I enjoy doing. I also make quilts for sick children. I am sure they are not looking over how good or bad the quilt is. Knowing something I made beautiful or not is going to brighten someone's day keeps me finishing each quilt sooner (or sometimes) later.
#7
Super Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Michigan
Posts: 3,334
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Alas, I can relate. I love to put tops together but the quilting slows me down. I love hand quilting but that takes so long. I have one on the frame right now and I've been working on it every day but I leave for the summer cabin soon and it will sit till next fall..... still unfinished. And machine quilting??? It just never turns out as nice..... no matter what I do the squares aren't as straight and smooth as with the hand quilting. So, I understand your frustration. I have to make myself do the quilting..... love the pieceing.
I do like hopetoquilt's idea though..... show us what you have and we'll encourage you.
I do like hopetoquilt's idea though..... show us what you have and we'll encourage you.
#8
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For me, I feel a profound sadness when I finish a quilt. It's very hard to even explain. I want to avoid that sadness, so I prolong finishing. The sadness is there even if the quilt is the best and prettiest I have made. I have been known to simply drop the quilt on the floor after the last stitch on the binding is done. Why? Because all the planning and preparation was what got my juices flowing. I think it's like having a child grow up and not need his parents anymore. The end result may be what you had hoped it would be all those years, but it hurts to have the process over.
#9
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I'm sorry you lose interest and don't get the quilts finished. PLEASE show them - we all love to look at folks' beautiful works. I hope you find the joy that comes from finishing the quilt...Or maybe you'll find someone who will finish them because they don't like to put tops together..
#10
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As I Coast Guard wive I have met a lot of women who worry about what others think. I always tell them it is none of their business. I know after 40 years its hard to put those negative words behind you, but remember you can do anything you set your mind to. You are your own person with a talent nothing like your sisters. Talents come in many shapes, sizes and ability. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. The Quilters eye sees things that a non quilters eye doesn't see. Please share your quilts with us, let us praise you and build your confidence to finish them. Maybe you can dedicate a quilt to a needy family in your community, this commitment could be the kick in the bottom you need to finish it and give it to someone.
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