False Praise
04-26-2011, 01:36 PM
#151
Super Member
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Stacyville Iowa
Posts: 1,608
I read most all of this thread and I am wondering if the question about false praise was because someone praised a quilt that the poster didn't think was good enough to deserve the praise. What I may see as praise worthy, she/he may think 'what is she talking about, that isn't very good'.
Maybe we know the story behind the quilt and realize that it is fantastic for the person to accomplish what they have, and the praise will encourage them to go on.
We all have our own taste and what one may think is false praise may be very genuine, if you are the one giving false praise- stop there are so many more people willing to give true encouraging praise that is welcomed.
Maybe we know the story behind the quilt and realize that it is fantastic for the person to accomplish what they have, and the praise will encourage them to go on.
We all have our own taste and what one may think is false praise may be very genuine, if you are the one giving false praise- stop there are so many more people willing to give true encouraging praise that is welcomed.
04-26-2011, 01:42 PM
#152
Super Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Huber Heights, Ohio
Posts: 2,351
Originally Posted by Vanuatu Jill
Everyone started with their "first" quilt, and I would venture to guess, they weren't perfect or necessarily well-blended color choices (I know mine wasn't!). But, if I had someone say it was ugly colors, or my seams didn't match, etc, I might not have made another. I, for one, will offer my opinion on color, ideas for borders, etc (although, I am no expert, either) IF asked, but if someone is so proud they have decided to post it on the board, I would never think of bursting their bubble. We,on this board, are of ALL levels of experience, and we should all be encouraging to other quilters to continue. Like others have stated, if it is really terrible (and that is according to each of OUR standards), I will make a comment like "congradulations!" or find some positive thing to say, or just not comment. Having said that, imagine someone posting their first block-quilt-etc, and hardly anyone commented! That right there would be very deflating to the proud quilter.
04-26-2011, 02:34 PM
#154
Super Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Perry, Oklahoma
Posts: 4,373
Originally Posted by Debbie B
Originally Posted by Vanuatu Jill
Everyone started with their "first" quilt, and I would venture to guess, they weren't perfect or necessarily well-blended color choices (I know mine wasn't!). But, if I had someone say it was ugly colors, or my seams didn't match, etc, I might not have made another. I, for one, will offer my opinion on color, ideas for borders, etc (although, I am no expert, either) IF asked, but if someone is so proud they have decided to post it on the board, I would never think of bursting their bubble. We,on this board, are of ALL levels of experience, and we should all be encouraging to other quilters to continue. Like others have stated, if it is really terrible (and that is according to each of OUR standards), I will make a comment like "congradulations!" or find some positive thing to say, or just not comment. Having said that, imagine someone posting their first block-quilt-etc, and hardly anyone commented! That right there would be very deflating to the proud quilter.
But for me I don't mind being help, if you see me doing something really bad, tell me. Otherwise I think I'm doing great...LOL
I might take your advise and then maybe I won't but really what people to be honest with me...Cause I really want to make beautiful quilts....just don't be to harsh...LOL LOL
04-26-2011, 02:44 PM
#155
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Woodstock, GA USA
Posts: 1,250
Originally Posted by JanieW
I read the quilt police thread and some of the comments made me think about the issue of giving false praise.
When someone has made a quilt that is poorly put together or there isn't enough contrast with colour choices, or it just plain doesn't look right, are we being fair by complimenting them?
I don't believe in embarrassing a person by pointing out mistakes or telling them that they have to do it the "right" way. I don't believe in telling someone their work is lovely when it isn't. Being positive and encouraging is essential, but damning with faint praise is harmful.
Where is the line between trying to help someone improve their skills and being the dreaded hated quilt police?
When someone has made a quilt that is poorly put together or there isn't enough contrast with colour choices, or it just plain doesn't look right, are we being fair by complimenting them?
I don't believe in embarrassing a person by pointing out mistakes or telling them that they have to do it the "right" way. I don't believe in telling someone their work is lovely when it isn't. Being positive and encouraging is essential, but damning with faint praise is harmful.
Where is the line between trying to help someone improve their skills and being the dreaded hated quilt police?
hmm....if someone asks for help that would be appropriate but if someone is just posting 'look what I did' then only a positive comment is appropriate...trying to improve their skills then would just be presumptive.
04-26-2011, 03:02 PM
#156
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Las Vegas, NV
Posts: 69
I've just started quilted a few months ago & I know my quilts are not perfect and maybe my color choices are not the best. When I ask someone what they think of my quilt I want to know their honest opinion. I need to know what I'm doing wrong or what other color choices whould of been better. How else am I going to learn the correct way or good color choices
04-26-2011, 03:09 PM
#157
Junior Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Cypress, Texas by the way of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Posts: 155
There is no such thing as an ugly quilt. It isn't just the pattern and fabric. It is the many long hours spent dreaming, planning, stitching with love, and the joy when completed. I have quilts my kids have loved as babies , even where there was nothing left but a few scraps of fabric. I have the first quilt I made for DH and it is worn to holes, but it still is beautiful and something he won't give up even though he has many quilts to choose from. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and noones tastes are the same. I am remembering my beginners class where we had to make a certain block and bring the following week to class for show and tell. How some colors pleased me and others , not so much. But other gals loved the ones I did not like. Enough said.
Donna
Donna
04-26-2011, 03:18 PM
#158
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: San Antonio, FL
Posts: 62
One thing I really like about this board is that everyone is sooo encouraging to newbies and everyone, really. Sometimes I look at some of the color choices and know they would never be something I'd choose. Still, variety is the spice of life and we all have different tastes - that's what makes quilting so much fun and infinitely interesting. No one has to comment on a photo if they don't want to. I certainly wouldn't if I didn't like it. I agree with those say "If you can't say something nice, why say anything at all." If someone asks for help or suggestions, they need to be prepared to hear what others say. Even then, suggestions can be made in a positive way.
04-26-2011, 03:49 PM
#159
Super Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 1,044
Maybe there colors dont realy go together. BUT it might be all they had to work with, or maybe there seams are not stright , BUT maybe the have some health problem that stops them form making a stright seam. Maybe the blocks they choose to make are not what u would of made for that pattern BUT in there eyes its what they like. So dont be to fast at telling someone what you think is wrong with there sewing , Maybe its just the best they can do or the best they have. BUT all the counts is they are doing it and they like it. One never knows what the other person life is like.
04-26-2011, 04:10 PM
#160
Senior Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: WV
Posts: 819
Originally Posted by Lv2sew2011
Yes when your able to see how many view like 572 and you only get 15 coments, its like ok what am I doing wrong, so basicly its darn if you do or darn if you don't... LOL
But for me I don't mind being help, if you see me doing something really bad, tell me. Otherwise I think I'm doing great...LOL
I might take your advise and then maybe I won't but really what people to be honest with me...Cause I really want to make beautiful quilts....just don't be to harsh...LOL LOL
But for me I don't mind being help, if you see me doing something really bad, tell me. Otherwise I think I'm doing great...LOL
I might take your advise and then maybe I won't but really what people to be honest with me...Cause I really want to make beautiful quilts....just don't be to harsh...LOL LOL
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