how to handle a quilt shop moment
#21
Super Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: The Deep South near Cajun Country, USA
Posts: 5,429
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Originally Posted by raptureready
I reread your post and you say that you really liked the woman that did this. Chances are that she really likes you to and felt at ease yelling across the parking lot to you. She probably didn't mean to cause you any distress. Speak to her about it. Be nice. Just tell her that you didn't realize that you had to pay if you didn't stay but that you wished she'd waited until the next time you came in and said something then because it really embarrassed you the way it was handled. But be nice, be understanding. She may have been having a really bad day.
Please don't drop out. Make a joke of it at the next meeting. Just laugh about there really being quilt police and that they'll chase you down for a couple of bucks.
Other people can only make you feel bad if you allow them too. By not dealing with it you'll only end up full of resentment. Just take a deep breath, hitch up your big girl britches and get it over with so that you can move on.
Please don't drop out. Make a joke of it at the next meeting. Just laugh about there really being quilt police and that they'll chase you down for a couple of bucks.
Other people can only make you feel bad if you allow them too. By not dealing with it you'll only end up full of resentment. Just take a deep breath, hitch up your big girl britches and get it over with so that you can move on.
#22
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I believe the clerks' behavior was unacceptable. In today's economy, they should be more thankful you are there. I too don't like confrontation. However, I have learned to speak with my wallet (credit card). When I am treated poorly, I just don't return. Eventually the shop owner will call to see if "I am alright". My $20.00 - 40.00 purchase weekly doesn't seem like much at the time. But, when your shop is short $150.00 a month for 1 customer it makes a difference. (If it happened to you, it probably happened to others, multiply that and it adds up at the end of the month). Her call to check on me or ask if I am joining the new group gives me the opportunity to discuss the situation calmly after I have overcome my feelings. I very much like going to the shops to actually see and touch the fabrics, however I have started shopping online recently and have not been disappointed with my purchases. The thing I miss is the friendship I have made sitting and stitching. I have invited several of the ladies to my home to sit, chat, and stitch. This summer I made a simple salad and iced tea for lunch. With winter coming a hot bowl of soup with some crusty rolls or bread make a nice treat. Just my thoughts.
#23
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Originally Posted by cathyvv
Assuming you are a 'regular', then this was completely out of line.
#25
Super Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: altamont NY
Posts: 1,249
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Occasionally a LQS just does not seem to get the business aspect of running a shop. I took a large quilt in to choose a border and the clerk said "not my colors" there are enough shops around so I will not be shopping there again. Not the first time similar attitude was shown. Don't get it.
#26
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I have been on both sides of the fence and I think the gal may have felt comfortable to call you across the parking lot, she may have been under pressure for not getting payment before, and maybe she couldn't leave the shop to come out to you. I think if you like her just ask her, I have done acts that I didn't realize offended someone until they told me or someone else pointed it out, so please give her the benefit of the doubt. Chalk it up to bad timing, bad day and maybe with your busy schedule you missed the information about payment when you signed up. Keep up the good work, I went back to college to further my education when I was 40 and I know how stressful that period can be.
#27
Super Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Appleton, WI
Posts: 1,008
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I understand exactly how you feel. If that happened to me I would be just as if not more, upset. My problem is that after I get over the hurt, I get mad. In order to be the better person, I find I tend to stay away. I would definately call the owner/manager before my anger set in. So sorry this happened.
#28
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I think the only way to handle this is to speak to the person concerned, about how you feel. Use lots of "I" statements and ask her to assist you as to how you can feel more comfortable in the situation.Then ask the owner to explain the 'rules' to you more carefully, so that you can't have the same misunderstanding again. If you don't speak up, the people will continue with their bad behaviour and you will continue to feel lousy. You don't have to be their best friend - you just need to have a working relationship with them.
#29
Super Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Ohio
Posts: 2,148
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Do not let one incident stop you from shopping at this LQS if is usually helpful and carries fabric that you like. You should talk to the owner or sales clerk to get a verification of the "rules" for the group. Perhaps the clerk was wrong. Every one else has probably forgot or did not notice this incident so hold you head high and go back into the store and your meeting.
#30
Power Poster
Join Date: May 2008
Location: MN
Posts: 24,581
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Originally Posted by Barb in Louisiana
Originally Posted by raptureready
I reread your post and you say that you really liked the woman that did this. Chances are that she really likes you to and felt at ease yelling across the parking lot to you. She probably didn't mean to cause you any distress. Speak to her about it. Be nice. Just tell her that you didn't realize that you had to pay if you didn't stay but that you wished she'd waited until the next time you came in and said something then because it really embarrassed you the way it was handled. But be nice, be understanding. She may have been having a really bad day.
Please don't drop out. Make a joke of it at the next meeting. Just laugh about there really being quilt police and that they'll chase you down for a couple of bucks.
Other people can only make you feel bad if you allow them too. By not dealing with it you'll only end up full of resentment. Just take a deep breath, hitch up your big girl britches and get it over with so that you can move on.
Please don't drop out. Make a joke of it at the next meeting. Just laugh about there really being quilt police and that they'll chase you down for a couple of bucks.
Other people can only make you feel bad if you allow them too. By not dealing with it you'll only end up full of resentment. Just take a deep breath, hitch up your big girl britches and get it over with so that you can move on.
Is this person USUALLY nice to you? Do you want to get the rest
of the blocks?
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