how to handle a quilt shop moment
10-05-2010, 06:39 PM
#61
Super Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Portland, OR via Hawaii
Posts: 1,342
Originally Posted by kristen0112
Originally Posted by niftynickel
Thanks because I have felt like crying all day!!!
It could be that Iam trying to finish a graduate course in record time too. I didn't say a word to this lady, and she is the one I really like in this shop. The owner is generally touchy so talking with her is definitely out. She scares me. I may just drop out of this monthly group and not join another at this shop.
It could be that Iam trying to finish a graduate course in record time too. I didn't say a word to this lady, and she is the one I really like in this shop. The owner is generally touchy so talking with her is definitely out. She scares me. I may just drop out of this monthly group and not join another at this shop.
I had a similar situation someone hollering at me across the cul-de-sac, I was dumping yard debris on a corner of my lot, (to start a compost pile) but the way it is situated she could see it, and she didn't like it so she yelled across the neighborhood - IT WAS EMBARRASSING! I felt that all the neighbors heard. Up until that point I had liked Lynn but not after that. I never confronted her about her rude behavior and never talked with her again. But it only hurt me more. If you really like the shop and think it won't always bug you then don't say a word but it will probably bug you and leave a sour taste in your mouth a long time... Good Luck
If the "rules" of payment are not clear, a suggestion could be made that maybe a printed policy could be made available if not posted.
10-05-2010, 10:36 PM
#62
Junior Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Grays River, WA.
Posts: 216
There is a witch of a woman who seems to enjoy constantly making nasty remarks to me at the quilt group I joined. Well I didn't go for three years. I could have been learning and sharing with other quilters for all that time.
I can work with anyone no matter how nasty they are, I might not like it or them but it my job includes getting on with what needs to be done and not dealing in personalities. If humor doesn't work, ignoring them does.
Anyhow, don't make the mistake I did because of a bad experience, I think the clerk acted thoughtlessly but doesn't sound as if she was being malicious. It does sound like she goofed or her boss did and she was asked to call you back.
She could have called you at home or asked you the next month for the $$. I would ask if guild members had shop priviledges that other customers don't. Some guilds do a lot of shopping and sewing for charity and work with quilt shop owners, at least they do here.
I would go out of my mind working and doing Masters or degree work, good thing your a quilter! Don't let anyone chase you away or keep you from doing something you love, more importantly, don't let anyone ruin your experience. This is your time out. My Mom used to say, don't let anyone rain on your parade. She was right. Best of luck, don't stop, lots of terrific advise here for you.. You can deal with this, easy peezy next to degree work. Go for it. Cindy
I can work with anyone no matter how nasty they are, I might not like it or them but it my job includes getting on with what needs to be done and not dealing in personalities. If humor doesn't work, ignoring them does.
Anyhow, don't make the mistake I did because of a bad experience, I think the clerk acted thoughtlessly but doesn't sound as if she was being malicious. It does sound like she goofed or her boss did and she was asked to call you back.
She could have called you at home or asked you the next month for the $$. I would ask if guild members had shop priviledges that other customers don't. Some guilds do a lot of shopping and sewing for charity and work with quilt shop owners, at least they do here.
I would go out of my mind working and doing Masters or degree work, good thing your a quilter! Don't let anyone chase you away or keep you from doing something you love, more importantly, don't let anyone ruin your experience. This is your time out. My Mom used to say, don't let anyone rain on your parade. She was right. Best of luck, don't stop, lots of terrific advise here for you.. You can deal with this, easy peezy next to degree work. Go for it. Cindy
10-06-2010, 04:58 AM
#63
Super Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: PA
Posts: 2,879
It sounds to me after reading all this, that you could help ALL the folks in this group, if you are willing to step forward and discuss what happened. I'm understanding that the store would give you free fabric and pattern for a BOM, with your participation as part of the deal. They should be more clear what they want that participation to be - is showing up to pick up the fabric enough? - or does one have to stay for the class? The shop should clearly spell that out. How about if someone doesn't finish the project - do they have to reimburse the shop for the supplies? That seems like that could shape up as a bone of contention, too. I hate to always be playing devil's advocate, but I would imagine the store started this program, not to give away free fabric, but to try to build foot traffic and sales. Granted, they should not have been so rude, and you should discuss that with them, too, although I tend to agree with the person who said that they probably felt comfortable with you, and did not intentionally try to offend you. But if participation is part of the deal, and you didn't participate, offering to pay whatever nominal fee it was, could have avoided this whole thing. Yeah, I know - hindsight!
10-06-2010, 05:22 AM
#64
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 547
Originally Posted by raptureready
I reread your post and you say that you really liked the woman that did this. Chances are that she really likes you to and felt at ease yelling across the parking lot to you. She probably didn't mean to cause you any distress. Speak to her about it. Be nice. Just tell her that you didn't realize that you had to pay if you didn't stay but that you wished she'd waited until the next time you came in and said something then because it really embarrassed you the way it was handled. But be nice, be understanding. She may have been having a really bad day.
Please don't drop out. Make a joke of it at the next meeting. Just laugh about there really being quilt police and that they'll chase you down for a couple of bucks.
Other people can only make you feel bad if you allow them too. By not dealing with it you'll only end up full of resentment. Just take a deep breath, hitch up your big girl britches and get it over with so that you can move on.
Please don't drop out. Make a joke of it at the next meeting. Just laugh about there really being quilt police and that they'll chase you down for a couple of bucks.
Other people can only make you feel bad if you allow them too. By not dealing with it you'll only end up full of resentment. Just take a deep breath, hitch up your big girl britches and get it over with so that you can move on.
Debbie in Austin
10-17-2010, 05:18 PM
#65
Super Member
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Originally from NY, now retired in Argentina. Miss the USA!!! :-(
Posts: 1,577
Originally Posted by shequilts
Nifty:
As we've all heard before, "it takes all kinds." It's a pity this person gets to deal with the public, but if the shop owner is also an ___ ____, why would she (the clerk) act any differently?
I feel for your embarassment, but it is the clerk who should be embarrassed. I can assure you those who heard the exchange were just glad that it wasn't them. They thought no less of "you for making a mistake any one could have made.
Don't let this stop you from attending your meeting. I've always told my kids, "you can go anywhere if you act like you know what you're doing." Walk in there like you own the shop and have a ball. I'd likely make some joke (out loud) about being yelled at by "the teacher". She'll get the message.
There are stupid people everywhere. When I encounter one in business or on a personal level. I just wash my hands of the event, not the person.
As we've all heard before, "it takes all kinds." It's a pity this person gets to deal with the public, but if the shop owner is also an ___ ____, why would she (the clerk) act any differently?
I feel for your embarassment, but it is the clerk who should be embarrassed. I can assure you those who heard the exchange were just glad that it wasn't them. They thought no less of "you for making a mistake any one could have made.
Don't let this stop you from attending your meeting. I've always told my kids, "you can go anywhere if you act like you know what you're doing." Walk in there like you own the shop and have a ball. I'd likely make some joke (out loud) about being yelled at by "the teacher". She'll get the message.
There are stupid people everywhere. When I encounter one in business or on a personal level. I just wash my hands of the event, not the person.
Shame on the clerk.
10-17-2010, 06:31 PM
#67
Super Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: London, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,326
She was out of line yelling at you. She should have been more discreet. Deal with it. Don't let it fester and become a big deal in your mind.
"Don't let her (rudeness) live rent free in your brain."
"Don't let her (rudeness) live rent free in your brain."
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