Ask him.
He is the "customer," and what he wants goes.

I'd ask your friend. Me personally? I think I'd be upset if the name was left out. Alive or dead, my child is my child, and a part of the family. I like "In loving memories of xxxx."

i think what ever names he gave you to be included should be included.

My son passed away but I still include his name on many things. You will never insult the receiver, hearing and seeing a lost loved ones name is music to their eyes. You could put something like , Nick (from heaven), or Nick (our guardian angel)

When you list the names, could you put some angel wings next to the deceased name?

I'll try to make the angel wings, thank you everyone, when the label is made it will say, "made for_____ made by_____ given by____ (all siblings), 2010.

I agree that first check with your friend.. but I would include ALL of the children... even with demintia and the confusion of time... there are some things that are not forgotten. My bff of 48 years lost her brother to a drunk driver running into their yard and killing him. That was in 1966... there are still times when she mentions him.