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nana2madmax 06-23-2016 06:01 AM

I also agree with Bree

Oistin 06-23-2016 06:11 AM

I think it is your sister in law 's way of trying to make amends. Make it without charging her . Send it on with your blessings and wait for that thank you note.lol. Don't send a bill . Send her a note telling her you hope she enjoys it. Do it for your niece.

dorismae904 06-23-2016 06:28 AM

I agree with Olstin.

maviskw 06-23-2016 06:41 AM


Originally Posted by PurplePassion (Post 7584511)
She is my oldest brother's wife, lives in the other side of the country. He pasted away a few years back, but I was not notified till a week later and by another brother. We aren't a real close family. I have seen a lot of great ideas here; I wish I would have thought to make my post early on. But I think I will get it quilted, as cheap as I can ; and just send it to her with a note making mention of the cost of quilting. Maybe she will find it in her heart to reimburse me --maybe not. Either way , I learned my lesson and have picked up some good tips from you guys. Thank you

My husband's brother-in-law passed away in the next state and we didn't hear about it until the funeral was over. He was quite upset.
But you are doing the right thing. Bless your heart. You are the one who will be able to sleep at night, and you WILL be rewarded. Maybe not in this life!

Nanax4 06-23-2016 06:53 AM

Always be kind. Unless you can be Batman, then be Batman. <----- Love this!

I like many of the suggestions, especially the one about sending the top to the niece who can then have it quilted and have something special to gift to her mother. A bonus to that is: the sil can't complain about the choice of quilting because her daughter chose it. And it makes the niece a part of the gift then. Gives her some ownership in this mess.

Maybe write a letter to the quilt, thanking it for the kindness it will be showing to your sil. You want to send the quilt off with good vibes. You want it to be happy. Bless it and send it on it's way. Throw away the letter. :-)

selm 06-23-2016 07:25 AM


Originally Posted by dunster (Post 7584045)
I would have told her that I would add her name to the list of people who want a quilt, but it's a long list. Or tell her that you can't really afford to make a quilt for everyone who wants one, so if she would like to pay for the quilting and supplies it will be $X. I would not send a bill to anyone who is not expecting one.

I'm with Dunster.

joyce blint 06-23-2016 08:07 AM

If you decide to complete and send it I have 2 suggestions: 1) You should use the appropriate PERMANENT marker and label it directly on the quilt backing. Made for xxxx, date, made by yyyy. This will make it less likely to be sold or donated by her. Then you could say that for insurance purposes you were adding an approximate list of the cost of making it. Maybe she'd get the idea, maybe not.

quiltingcandy 06-23-2016 08:40 AM

When you send it - make sure you get it tracked so you know when it is delivered. Now a days so many people fail to acknowledge receipt of packages.

RedGarnet222 06-23-2016 09:19 AM

Sometimes life is a test of your love and patience with those around you. I have always just gone ahead and done what I was asked because god always blesses my efforts in some unexpected way. It isn't the things I did do that ruin my mind, it is the things that I struggle against and resent that hurt my peace of mind and existence in this world.

This lady is oblivious to the request she made now. But, as she uses your lovely quilt, she will become aware of the love and effort you spent on her. I think you are one sweet lady to give of your talent and time. Maybe her heart will grow from this experience.

Bren 06-23-2016 10:42 AM

She has a lot of nerve IMHO. However I agree with the majority who say send it on and let it go. The ball is now in her court.


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