What would you do?
#1
What would you do?
I made a throw size quilt for my niece last winter. She lives in TX, I like her and we message each other a lot. Her mother, my sister in law; went to visit her and saw the quilt I made. She had told her daughter she really liked it and was threatening to steal it when she went home. This sister in law lives in NV, is 10 years older than me and has barely said 3 words to me in the past years, and I haven't heard from her in many , many years. She sent me a message saying that the quilt was beautiful, and could I make her a quilt. I had no plans on making her one , but then my niece messaged me and said her mom would really love a quilt and told me the colors she likes. Sis made no mention of paying me for making it, or postage or anything. Well I have the quilt top done and need to take it to a LArm to get quilted. I used fabric I had for the top but had to buy the backing , batting and pay for quilting. So should I send her the quilt with a bill, or just send it with my blessings ? I doubt that she will offer any money. I made the quilt for my niece because I wanted to, but it is hard making one for someone you don't care for.
#3
Super Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Tulsa, Ok
Posts: 4,582
You have already spent the time and effort to make the top, so if it was me, I would get it finished and send it on. Like you said, you are really doing it for your niece, who hopefully will get it anyway eventually after her Mother is gone. Never hurts to take the high road.
#6
I would have told her that I would add her name to the list of people who want a quilt, but it's a long list. Or tell her that you can't really afford to make a quilt for everyone who wants one, so if she would like to pay for the quilting and supplies it will be $X. I would not send a bill to anyone who is not expecting one.
#7
Super Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Central NJ
Posts: 5,572
I'd say, if you can afford it, just send it on with your good wishes. You already know you won't get paid if you send a bill, so why bother. It is only going to create hard feelings from a) the SIL and perhaps b) the niece with whom you have a loving relationship. I doubt you would want to jeopardize that relationship. Again, if you can afford it, chalk the expense up to just being one of the good guys and let it go.
If finances are particularly tight, you could always include a nice note saying that it would help your situation with a contribution to the cost of X dollars spent in completing the quilt vs an actual bill.
If finances are particularly tight, you could always include a nice note saying that it would help your situation with a contribution to the cost of X dollars spent in completing the quilt vs an actual bill.
#8
Super Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,991
Send the quilt with your blessings knowing that you have taken the high road and try and focus on any of the good times you once had with your sister. Perhaps your quilt will be the start of a better relationship between the two of you. I'm sure that your niece will appreciate your thoughtfulness.
#10
Power Poster
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Southern USA
Posts: 16,515
My first reaction would be to have said, Join the club, everyone wants a quilt. And then laughed it off and changed the subject. But since you felt obligated to make one I would send it to her but be prepared to get more requests. Many think they are doing a quilter a favor by asking for a quilt. You need to put your feelings first when it comes to being cornered.
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