Christmas Stars
12-27-2009, 04:55 AM
#31
Super Member
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 9,496
Originally Posted by Loretta
After thinking a few minutes I thought I would share with you my rejected gift and I shed a few tears too- our whole family pooled our money to buy my mother a years worth of internet and phone service. And she was furious! She also said she didn't want us to visit her in Colorado anymore either. I couldn't believe it as it came to a lot of money. Some people are just ungrateful I guess. (I am better today.)
12-27-2009, 09:16 AM
#33
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Washington state
Posts: 820
What a nice gift (free internet and phone service). You guys were very thoughtful to try to find something that she could use.
I enjoyed gift giving this year. I tried to find something that fit the person that I was buying for. I know that some of my gifts were not big or spectacular but they were gifts that were made with thought and love. I gave books that fit their lifestyle and I gave home made gifts (like a table runner and serging several fleece blankets).
Now here is the kicker. I decided before Christmas that I am not responsible for other people's happiness. When I bought something or made something, it was not done with the idea that this would be their favorite gift. It was not given with the idea that this item would make them happy. (Happiness comes from within the soul and no one can make another person happy.) The gifts I gave were gifts of love but it was up to the recepient on whether they would be happy or not.
Having that attitude really took the pressure off of gift-giving and when some of the recepients were luke-warm in appreciating the fleece blankets, that was okay. I knew I gave it out of the right motivation and it was up to them to receive it with the right motivation.
The gifts that were given to me were not spectacular (well one was) but I appreciated ALL of the gifts that were given, not just the spectacular one.
I enjoyed gift giving this year. I tried to find something that fit the person that I was buying for. I know that some of my gifts were not big or spectacular but they were gifts that were made with thought and love. I gave books that fit their lifestyle and I gave home made gifts (like a table runner and serging several fleece blankets).
Now here is the kicker. I decided before Christmas that I am not responsible for other people's happiness. When I bought something or made something, it was not done with the idea that this would be their favorite gift. It was not given with the idea that this item would make them happy. (Happiness comes from within the soul and no one can make another person happy.) The gifts I gave were gifts of love but it was up to the recepient on whether they would be happy or not.
Having that attitude really took the pressure off of gift-giving and when some of the recepients were luke-warm in appreciating the fleece blankets, that was okay. I knew I gave it out of the right motivation and it was up to them to receive it with the right motivation.
The gifts that were given to me were not spectacular (well one was) but I appreciated ALL of the gifts that were given, not just the spectacular one.
12-27-2009, 08:47 PM
#36
Super Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Pine Grove, California
Posts: 2,816
Loretta, your gift was thoughtful and generous and I just don't know what "is wrong" with your mother. She should be ashamed.
And, Terri, I would have to say the same for picky daughter.
Ultimately, though, as quilters we have to keep in mind that the joy of quilting is the actual work and giving of the completed gift. We have no control over how it is received. I would NEVER make anything else for picky daughter.
(it's also making me very nervous about the quilt I'm planning for my own picky daughter...... :hunf: )
And, Terri, I would have to say the same for picky daughter.
Ultimately, though, as quilters we have to keep in mind that the joy of quilting is the actual work and giving of the completed gift. We have no control over how it is received. I would NEVER make anything else for picky daughter.
(it's also making me very nervous about the quilt I'm planning for my own picky daughter...... :hunf: )
12-27-2009, 09:53 PM
#37
Super Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Central Illinois
Posts: 2,329
I truly love every one of your Christmas quilts. I'm so sorry your gift was not well received. I have a feeling one day picky daughter will look back and wish she had more of your beautiful handwork. Some only learn in retrospect. It is not worth trying to please her with a quilt again, so move on and don't try.
Loretta, I'm sorry the gift for your mother didn't go well. It was thoughtful and caring, no matter what she said. If your mother has always been this way, it's not likely that she is going to change now, no matter what you give her. If she is getting older and changing, sometimes people's personalities alter with medication or the aging process, and, again, it is not a reflection on you. You may just have to say well, that's the way she is. You are not responsible for her happiness. You can only control how you respond. Don't let it eat you up and ruin your Christmas.
Loretta, I'm sorry the gift for your mother didn't go well. It was thoughtful and caring, no matter what she said. If your mother has always been this way, it's not likely that she is going to change now, no matter what you give her. If she is getting older and changing, sometimes people's personalities alter with medication or the aging process, and, again, it is not a reflection on you. You may just have to say well, that's the way she is. You are not responsible for her happiness. You can only control how you respond. Don't let it eat you up and ruin your Christmas.
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