Ways To Tell You Are Grown Up
#1
Ways To Tell You Are Grown Up
Your houseplants are alive, and you can’t smoke any of them.
Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
6:00 a.m. is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
You hear your favorite song in an elevator.
You watch the weather channel.
Your friends marry and divorce instead of “hook up” and “break up.”
You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.
Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as “dressed up.”
You’re the one calling the police because those kids next door won’t turn down the stereo.
Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
You don’t know what time TACO Bell closes anymore.
Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
You feed your dogs’ science diet instead of MacDonald’s leftovers.
Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
You take naps.
Dinner and a move is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.
Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 am would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.
You go to the drug store for Ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.
You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
“I just can’t drink the way I used to” replaces “I’m never going to drink that much again.”
90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate them instead of asking “what happened?”
BONUS: You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn’t apply to you and can’t find one to save your self. Then you forward it to a bunch of old friends ‘cause you know they’ll enjoy it too.
Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
6:00 a.m. is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
You hear your favorite song in an elevator.
You watch the weather channel.
Your friends marry and divorce instead of “hook up” and “break up.”
You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.
Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as “dressed up.”
You’re the one calling the police because those kids next door won’t turn down the stereo.
Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
You don’t know what time TACO Bell closes anymore.
Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
You feed your dogs’ science diet instead of MacDonald’s leftovers.
Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
You take naps.
Dinner and a move is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.
Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 am would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.
You go to the drug store for Ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.
You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
“I just can’t drink the way I used to” replaces “I’m never going to drink that much again.”
90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate them instead of asking “what happened?”
BONUS: You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn’t apply to you and can’t find one to save your self. Then you forward it to a bunch of old friends ‘cause you know they’ll enjoy it too.
Last edited by patricej; 09-15-2012 at 12:42 PM.
#10
Super Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Lebanon Missouri
Posts: 2,668
My DIL read this and thinks I have some growing up to do...I can still eat spicy chicken wings at 3 a.m. left over pizza for breakfast and for my last birthday SIL made us Margarita's and I said these are pretty good shit (I only drink on my birthday) and we won't talk about my houseplants and my idea of dressing up is jeans and a sweat shirt that are stain free and 6 a.m. is still when I go to bed and as soon as they start playing The Dead in elevators I'll start using them. And its the neighbors who complain my music is to loud.
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09-29-2011 03:19 AM